Aphy
70. Long on Caring, Short on Advice

Even though the family had grown up and moved out of the
home, Alphy and Margurita still provided love and guidance and
were there for their family when needed. They acknowledged that
their adult children had their own lives to live and needed to make
their own choices and decisions. Yet, Alphy and Margurita were
always ready to lend a helping hand. They were long on caring and
short on advice.

During the 1980's Alphy and Margurita saw a few of their
children struggle through some painful decisions, and broken
relationships which ended in divorce. By 1981, Eileen and Wendell
had divorced. Ivan and Cecilia had also divorced prior to this. These
were difficult times, but Alphy and Margurita took this in stride.
They didn’t offer advice, but let their children know they were
available if needed.

Alphy and Margurita had a profound understanding, which is
expressed beyond the spoken word. They seemed to know intuitively
how to give support in times of heartaches, loss and hardships.

By 1983, Eileen had moved to Charlottetown area (Brackley
Beach) with her children. She had returned to school, to work on a
social work degree. Her three young children were slowly adjusting
to the transition. It had been a rough winter financially for them,
and they were just ‘scraping by’ with a small income from a student
loan and financial assistance from Social Services. In the middle of
February, their only means of transportation, an old Volkswagen van
broke down - Eileen knew there was no way she could afford to
have it repaired, as there was barely enough money to buy groceries.
It would be months before the family could find affordable housing
closer to Charlottetown.

There were still three months left of the university year to
complete, if she were to get her credits for this year. Eileen did not
want to drop out this late in the game. There was only one thing to

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